A Wild Ride

So far, this cancer adventure has been quite similar to another adventure I had growing up. I was a barrel racer as a youngster and I rode a yellow quarter horse named Pretty Boy. He had a gorgeous long blond mane and tale. He could run like the wind and take a corner like nobody's business. He was as unpredictable as he was beautiful. Pretty Boy was a charmer who would entice me to ride him, because it looked like fun, then run like hell with me holding on for dear life. I didn't even have to kick him to move, I just leaned forward and he took me where he wanted to go while I hoped for the best. Was he going to scrape me off on the fence or knock me off with a low hanging branch if I couldn't stop him? My Dad would have the arena gate shut after the start of our race because we were never sure I'd be able to stop him when the ride was over. It was the closest thing to flying without a net I've ever experienced, until now. Specifically, the constant motion, change in directions and unpredictability of cancer and the medicines used to treat it.

This week was my first week on chemo. While taking the first accelerator drug, Xeloda, I started experiencing chest pains that traveled into my throat. It seems it might be okay to experience the known side effects such as nausea and vomiting, but you apparently shouldn't start experiencing different ones. Dr. F took me off the drug Sunday night. I still need to take the actual chemo drug, Temodar, starting today for five days. I'm supposed to discuss further with Dr. F. next Wednesday. I was really hoping for an easy ride. A quick one that got me from point A to B without being scraped off, but it seems to be as unpredictable as my rides on Pretty Boy. So, I've decided to sit lower in the saddle, keep my chin down and focus on enjoying the ride no matter how scary or exciting it gets. Dr. BAH reminded me last night not to worry about being taken off the Xeloda. I don't get extra points for toxicity so having as little as possible is better and that the Sandostatin (hormone treatment) is also doing the job. And yes, I'm still hitting at least 2-4 oz. of fresh wheatgrass juice daily which has to be doing something.

You may have noticed I've added links to a page of photos and several sites that might be helpful if you aren't familiar with this type of cancer. Thanks for indulging my analogies. I'll write again next week after my trip to MD Anderson.

smack, smack, kiss,
Jan